


Without You, I Am Nothing

by sniperct



Category: Apex Legends (Video Games)
Genre: Awkward Flirting, Cuddling & Snuggling, F/F, Father Figures, Found Family, Hurt/Comfort, Sharing a Bed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-15
Updated: 2020-06-15
Packaged: 2021-03-03 20:02:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,785
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24741241
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sniperct/pseuds/sniperct
Summary: Danger, the voice warned her. Her throat bobbed, and she laid her head back down and buried her face into Natalie’s hair. Her arm tightened around her and she felt like she was falling, falling without a jump pack and the ground rushing up towards her.Or, when Natalie is injured and Wraith has an epiphany
Relationships: Wattson | Natalie Paquette/Wraith | Renee Blasey
Comments: 15
Kudos: 167





	Without You, I Am Nothing

**Author's Note:**

> I am nothing if not predictable

****

**Then**

It wasn’t hard to learn what drink Wraith liked, at least not when you paid attention. And not when Mirage advertised it to the whole world with his big mouth. Which was, really, what helped the most so thank you Elliot.

Note to self, Natalie thought. Don’t trust Elliot with the big secrets. Maybe the smaller secrets that you actually wanted to get out.

But she liked him regardless in that sort of goofy brother sort of way. Of course, she generally liked everyone in her weird little Legends family except maybe for Revenant. But most especially she liked _Wraith_. What had started as a crush had blossomed into something deeper. And maybe Wraith couldn’t see what she meant to her, but Natalie was determined to catch her eye and make her see. Somehow.

Right. Appletini wasn’t it? Drink in hand, she came over to Wraith, setting it on the table in front of her before inviting herself to sit down. On the chair in front of Wraith. Not on the table. Or god forbid, on Wraith. 

Unless … well it was _tempting_ at any rate and her mind went through several variations that made her cheeks darken until she was able to snap herself out of it.

Wraith stared at the drink, then lifted her eyebrows as she looked up at Natalie, “Uh. Thanks?”

“You looked thirsty. But then you kind of always look a little thirsty.” 

“Yeah,” Wraith coughed and picked up the drink, downing half of it. “So what do you think about this whole Loba situation?”

Loba? She didn’t want to talk about Loba, she wanted to talk about Wraith. And herself. And herself and Wraith.

“I don’t know if we can trust her? But I think she’s nice, and she’s very pretty. And flirty.” Natalie tilted her head, then looked down at her own drink, “And I’m curious. About the artifact and what it could be and how it might work. Not curious about her. Okay, curious about her, but only because she’s new.”

Wraith stared at her.

“I’m still more curious about you if that makes you feel any better?” She was so bad at this! “ _Merde_...”

“I guess?” Wraith stared at her a moment longer, then knocked back the rest of her drink and stood. “I think I’m just gonna hit my bunk for a bit. Babysitting Octane is going to be exhausting and I should rest up for it.”

“Can I drop by later?” Natalie asked, peering up at her and doing her best to bat her eyelashes. She’d asked a few of the fans she regularly DM’d with for advice (vaguely worded which had still probably sprouted a thousand thousand posts about Wattson’s Romantic Prospects) but Wraith just gave her a puzzled look.

“Uh. Sure.”

“Merci. I just wanted to tinker on something but didn't want to do it alone.” She smiled, megawatt bright and Wraith chewed on her lip for a moment before quickly leaving the bar.

****

**Then**

_God, I wish that were me._

Wraith’s eyes snapped open, her muscles tensing as the voice rang in her head. But she was in her bunk, safe. No danger, no reason for the voices to warn her (and they’d never warned her before while she was in this bed). Still, there’d been that surge of adrenaline and she had the sense that something was amiss as she tried to come back to herself from a comfortable sleep.

That something turned out to be Natalie, which she found out when she tried to sit up. Natalie was on her side, back to Wraith and pressed bodily against her. Her body was so _warm_ , making Wraith’s pulse quicken. In the darkness, she couldn’t really make out whatever experiment Natalie had been working on. It was mostly coils and pieces of wire and bits of metal but she was sure it would cause a lot of pain to whoever ran into it in the Arena. Natalie always was working to improve her traps and whenever they were on opposing teams she did her best to avoid them.

Slowly, Wraith rolled onto her side to face Natalie, finding their bodies molding perfectly together when she did so. She brushed some hair away from her face and stared down at her. Wraith had rarely slowed down since the lab, moments of respite few and far between. She was running, always running even when she was standing still; her own mind rarely let her rest fully, giving her nightmares and tormenting her with pain and misery.

Wraith hadn’t had a nightmare at all tonight and she filed away that bit of information to worry about later as she continued to gaze at Natalie’s sleeping face. Something inside her shifted. A tightness in her chest and an ache in her heart. For the first time that she could remember, she wanted to kiss someone. And maybe she’d had for a little while now and maybe it was Natalie that she wanted to kiss, to wake up and figure out whatever this was she was feeling.

Gently, she stroked her fingers along the scars on Natalie’s cheek, tracing them. Maybe it was her imagination but Natalie seemed to lean into the touch. Slowly, Wraith leaned in, her lips brushing Natalie’s face.

_Danger_ the voice warned her. Her throat bobbed, and she laid her head back down and buried her face into Natalie’s hair. Her arm tightened around her and she felt like she was falling, falling without a jump pack and the ground rushing up towards her.

She slept again, and again there were no nightmares.

****

**Now**

Natalie felt like she was floating in pieces. Over there she could feel her leg, and to the right was one of her arms. Which was kind of silly since her prosthetic was her _left_ arm so why would her right arm be floating around in an endless void? Utterly ridiculous, if one asked her. No one _was_ but that wasn’t really the point now was it?

There were voices, echoing whispers with words she couldn't make out. The tone sounded serious, and there was anger. She thought she heard Alexander’s rumble, a hint of concern beneath it. She thought she heard Wraith, almost frantic and someone was shouting.

Wraith never got frantic and the doctor never showed concern, which meant that something was seriously wrong. Was it her? Did it have to do with her body parts not all being in the right place? Natalie struggled against the void; she felt her arm and legs begin to tingle, like they sometimes did when she was half asleep or had taken one shock too many tinkering with her equipment.

Which meant all her limbs were back they were supposed to be and that was a relief since she didn’t want to be out of the games long enough for either new ones to be cloned or mechanical ones to be fitted. And she quite liked all four of her limbs just the way they were, three flesh and one metal. She was used to that and changing it up would just _bother_ her. Though a return to symmetry wasn’t the worst thing in the world. If she had to choose, her right leg.

But the voices faded and she was left in silence. The silence was a deafening one, and for the first time she felt afraid. Afraid that she’d never crawl out of it, afraid that this was it. Had she died? Had she left her family, left _Wraith_ behind? Without ever telling her...

_Non_ , that wouldn’t do. But it still took more effort than she would have liked for her eyes to open, and then adjust to dim light. Machines beeped. Not the ones she liked or tinkered with, but medical ones with their tell-tale trill and intermittent tones.

She wasn’t alone. Something warm was pressed against her side and arms were wrapped around her waist. Natalie’s throat bobbed as she listened to Wraith breathing - she was certain it could be no one else, for no other reason than how perfectly they fit together and that she couldn’t see anyone else doing this. Eliot maybe but Wraith would probably kill him for real then.

She rolled her head to the right and sure enough there was Wraith’s familiar face. Unwelcome tears blurred her vision and she tried to blink them away. God, but she was beautiful. Warm and close and she couldn’t keep back the flood of emotions. Slowly, and in a voice as quiet as a mouse, Natalie whispered, “ _Sans toi, je ne suis rien._ ”

Wraith moved closer, her nose tickling Natalie’s ear. It felt really nice, and that flood overwhelmed her and burst out like a jolt from a tesla coil.

" _Je t’adore_ ," she whispered. Certain that Wraith couldn't hear her (or didn't know enough French to understand), she whispered louder, "I love you, chère."

It was safe, like this, it was safe because -- 

“Mm…?” Wraith shifted, mumbling sleepily. Her arm around her waist tightened a little and Natalie hissed lightly, but couldn’t bring herself to move it. A silly romantic part of her hoped that Wraith would nuzzle her ear again or maybe even kiss it; the little contact so far had felt like electricity. And of all people, Natalie would know.

“Nothing,” she whispered, already chickening out. But Wraith nuzzled her ear again, her breath so so _so_ warm. Maybe it was the painkillers, maybe it was how good this felt, but she couldn’t stop herself from gasping, “ _Ah…!_ ”

Immediately, Wraith sat up and peered down at her, looking both sheepish and concerned, “Are you okay? Did I hurt you?”

“ _Merde_.” Nat stared up at her, face burning, “I’m fine. See? Now get back down here, you being next to me is _conductive_ to my healing, you know.”

Wraith squinted as if unsure if that was a pun or not, her own face reddening. Natalie didn’t give her the satisfaction of an answer. She tugged on her, meaning to pull her back down besides her.

Later, Natalie would have to ask herself if it had actually been an accident or not. That maybe she really _had_ meant to pull Wraith down and kiss her after all. But their lips were touching. Wraith went perfectly still for a whole heartbeat and a half (Natalie counted), before she returned the kiss.

Oh, but her body ached and there were claw marks gouged in her skin and she was high as a kite and yet the kiss was the best (and first) kiss that she’d ever had. (But not the last, please don’t let it be the last) It lingered for several more heartbeats before Wraith lifted her head, ice-blue eyes watery and red.

“Don’t ever scare me like that again,” Wraith whispered, voice shaking. Natalie had never seen her like this. Raw and vulnerable, emotions on the edge of her skin and in her eyes.

Still, she teased, “If this is how I have to get you to kiss me, maybe I should get chewed on by prowlers more often.”

That was apparently the wrong thing to say. Wraith sucked in a breath and then gently, so gently, she lifted Nat up and pulled her against her.

That hurt more than she might have liked to admit, but Nat managed to keep from making anything more than a light whimper as she wrapped her arms around Wraith. Or at least she tried to. None of her limbs were quite working as well as they should and her entire body ached with a bone-deep exhaustion.

Non, that was the right thing to say, Nat decided. She rested her cheek on Wraith’s shoulder, waiting as the tension slowly eased out of the woman’s body.

“ _Je t'aime_ ,” Wraith whispered. Her accent was terrible but Natalie didn’t care. What mattered were the words, and the emotion behind them. “I’m also nothing without you.”

“Oh. You heard that?” Natalie’s heart sped back up, the machines beeping faster. _She loves me! Mon dieu she loves me!_

“A little.” Wraith pulled her head back, “Nox is going to kill me, isn’t he.”

“For interrupting my rest, maybe. But not for loving me.” She winked, “He’s secretly a big teddy bear, you know.”

Wraith started to laugh, then stiffened and all but dropped Nat back onto the bed, scrambling back into the chair next to her. 

“Oof,” Nat breathed, dizzy. Then she heard heavy footsteps and Alexander loomed in her field of view. She grinned up at his stern face, “Dr. Caustic! Bonjour! Nothing is happening at all!”

She heard, rather than saw, Wraith’s palm meet her face. Alexander’s eyes squinted behind his goggles, and she thought they were actually very nice eyes. Maybe not as nice as Wraith’s, but still pretty. Though she probably shouldn’t tell that to him to his face.

She could also feel the painkillers flowing back into her system and blurted, “Your eyes are pretty.”

“Uh.” His voice was deep and rumbly and oddly soothing, “If what I think is happening is happening, _it better not be._ ”

“I just woke up,” Nat assured him, snapping herself out of a deep thought experiment about why Wraith’s eyes were so gorgeous. Her words weren’t _strictly_ a lie, as she had in fact just woken up.

“You need rest,” Alexander said, before turning his head and glaring at Wraith. “Not relaxation.”

Wraith looked paler than usual, like she was three seconds from bolting. Natalie flailed her hand until she was able to grab Wraith’s and hoped that would be enough to keep her in place. She was floating again and wanted to sleep and wanted Wraith to be there while she did. “It’s … fine, we’re all fine. Oui?”

“We’re all fine,” Wraith croaked, looking like she was hearing ghosts.

He looked between them again, then grunted. “I will check on you later.” He pointed at Natalie, “You, rest.” Then he pointed at Wraith. “You, behave.”

Something from that strange period before she’d woken up made her ask, “You didn’t hurt Loba, did you?”

“No.” Both Wraith and Alexander answered at the exact same time, which told Natalie they’d both thought about it.

She didn’t have the energy to scold them, but was still grateful for it. No matter what Loba did, she didn’t deserve that. “ … Merci.”

“She nearly got you killed,” Wraith said.

Alexander nodded in agreement, “She is an unpredictable variable.”

“I know what it is like to lose a family,” Natalie said, closing her eyes. “If my Papa had been murdered and I had a chance to get the killer back, I don’t know that I wouldn’t be an unpredictable variable too.”

Alexander exhaled loudly, and while she couldn’t see either of their faces with her eyes closed, she could imagine their expressions.

“I’ll uhm. Be back later.” Wraith said, and Nat heard her stand. _Non, please stay._ But she was too afraid to voice it.

“No, you keep an eye on her.”

Natalie peeked open one eye. Alexander had started to walk towards the door. He stopped and looked back, “Make sure she rests, and that’s _it_. Save the _experiments_ for when she is recovered.”

Natalie barely managed to suppress a giggle as Wraith sat down and tried to sink into her chair. She supposed that was the only approval she could ever expect and honestly it was enough.

“He’s right,” She said, once the man had gone. “You really do need to rest.”

“This is true, but my lips need another test.” Natalie puckered up, “Just to make sure that we have accounted for all the variables.” 

Wraith leaned forward and rested her forehead on the bed. Natalie smiled, lazily stroking her fingers through Wraith’s hair. “I’m teasing.” Then she tugged, “Now get back up here with me.”

Wraith lifted her head and eyed her dubiously, “And if Nox returns?”

“I don’t care, chère.”

She watched as Wraith cautiously crawled back into the bed with her, and then snuggled in against her side, careful of the wires and tubes poking out of her. Her hand slid into her hair, gentle and slow, “It’s impossible to deny you.”

“I know, I am irresistible.” Natalie turned her head, finding Wraith’s face very, very close. Close enough to kiss, even.

Wraith seemed to be thinking along the same lines, because she closed the distance, one hand cupping Natalie’s face and caressing her scars.

Natalie was certain that the sensation of floating this time had nothing to do with painkillers. Her eyes fluttered closed, and as Wraith’s lips left hers one or both of them let out a contented sigh. 

“Je t'aime,” Natalie whispered, before sleep claimed her once again.


End file.
